Chuck Norris' beard is so grizzled and rough it can rub away the trade deficit and the national debt...of all nations...simultaneously.
He'd tell all the leeches "tough shit" and that goes for the banking industry as well. In turn, he'd advise everyone to protect themselves as the shit is about to hit the fan and asset prices will collapse, the welfare bunnies are about to hit the streets and pandemonium will break loose. Of course, this assumes some fictionalized Chuck Norris character, for all I know the real Chuck Norris might be a bleeding heart Hollywood liberal who fawns over Hopey.
chuck as fed chairmen would immediately print dollar bills with pics of his beard on the front, roundkick on the back. staring at the new greenbacks will cause an instant shift of all your buying power into chucks power. the more dollars you'd have, the more you're dead
you'd be afraid to hold or touch any dollars due to intense heat , cause every single bill was personally printed by chucks ass after eating spinach, garlic, black beans mixed with cayenne pepper and jalapenos and delivered by 5 million roundkicks to every store, village and bank around the world
"the love of money is the root of all evil" would get a new meaning.... but chuck's not bad. he just wants everyone to get the fuc#k his roundkick in the face! and suffer in pain with money or without
as a new chairman chuck will fly to china, say "dollar has value" leaving the audience in rivers of tears. no, not from laughter, from unspeakable fear...