I was once a trader going by Slartibartfast and I thought I could stop posting. I did actually.at first have long breaks while I traded profitably, never learned a damned thing from ET mind you but it was a way to pass a few minutes. Looking for a trader on the same wavelength perhaps. Never found one, just similar dark humour generally. I’d scroll past the nonsense. Let it slide. Walk away from someone being wrong on the internet. But then somebody stupid said something and next thing I know, I’m five sources deep, quoting Haaretz at 2am and explaining deterrence theory to a guy who thinks Oslo was a TED Talk. I told myself it was intellectual curiosity. Just keeping sharp. We all think we’re in control. That we can just… post less. That this thread won’t suck us in. That this time, we’ll be reasonable, brief, even. Civil. But the truth is: it’s a compulsion. And I’m not alone...
Real life exposure therapy: I'm making bread with the new mixer. Had it for three months and never used it. Weird thing, few Colombians have stand mixers as there are bakeries absolutely everywhere so no real point. My wife thinks its a foolish extravagance taking up space. Except their bread sucks, too much sugar, no effort to develop gluten. The only thing they get right is Pan de Bono. Crunchy crust and salty gooey inside.
Butter on the crust when hot makes it less crusty. Cheese, ham and pickle sandwiches... May get a Pullman loaf tin as the wife fell in love with crustless bread in Spain.
Knowing more than a little about addiction I have heard, and said, that line thousands of times. Once something, whatever it may be, trips your trigger, it's off and running. Best you can hope for is feed the addiction with something positive. That bread looks tasty.
I can quit but like smoking, I have to just quit, no patches, no mercy. It may be that I have more a fiddling with my phone problem than anything. I'm constantly getting WhatsApp and Signal etc. messages all day from a dozen directions, most are actually important, not frivolous. Sometimes it seems easier to just not put the phone down when waiting for a reply. Second I do, a notification chimes.. The bread was very nice, the extra kneading from the mixer helps a lot as flour in Colombia is not fancy where they tell you the gluten level, it's always low. Ideally the second rise is best overnight in the fridge.
You're right, there is no patch, no tapering off. A clean break is what works. It's uncomfortable, but as time passes that discomfort subsides. That's the danger zone. Selective memory sets in. It wasn't always bad, there were good times, I'm wiser, stronger, better prepared this time. It starts with a sip, a little taste, or in this case, lurking, no posting. See the world didn't split open and swallow me up, I'm fine. One little post, maybe, ironically, in the health and fitness forum. Next thing you know you're MFing someone on their STUPID FUCKING Political views. And we'll welcome you back, because we too have nowhere else to go.
A quote from one of my favorite westerns.: esus Raza: La RevoluciÛn is like a great love affair. In the beginning, she is a goddess. A holy cause. But... every love affair has a terrible enemy: time. We see her as she is. La RevoluciÛn is not a goddess but a whore. She was never pure, never saintly, never perfect. And we run away, find another lover, another cause. Quick, sordid affairs. Lust, but no love. Passion, but no compassion. Without love, without a cause, we are... *nothing*! We stay because we believe. We leave because we are disillusioned. We come back because we are lost. We die because we are committed. Just insert politics for La Revolutioun.