A guy took his blonde girlfriend to her first football game. They had great seats right behind their team's bench. After the game, he asked her how she liked it. "Oh, I really liked it," she replied, "especially the tight pants and all the big muscles, but I just couldnât understand why they were killing each other over 25 cents." Dumbfounded, her boyfriend asked, "What do you mean?" "Well, they flipped a coin, one team got it and then for the rest of the game, all they kept screaming was... 'Get the quarterback! Get the quarterback!' I'm like...Helloooooo? It's only 25 cents!!!!"
Ok.You've all heard it but here is my favorite blonde joke. A blond is driving down the highway when a cop pulls here over. The cop gets out of his cruiser and starts unzipping his fly. The blond thinks to herself, "Ãâh no! Not the breath analyzer test again!"
A good Catholic. As the young boy was praying for a new bicycle, his mother told him that's not how God works. She told him, you can only pray for Gods forgiveness. The next day he rode his newly stolen bicycle to confession.
In response to President Obama's recent complaint that FOX News doesn't show enough Black and Hispanic people on their network, FOX announced today that they will now air " America 's Most Wanted" TWICE a week.
Environmentalists have called for everyone to shut off their lights for an hour for earth day this year. It will be known as earth hour. They're calling it shopping hour in harlem.
Overheard two blondes talking in the breakroom at the the office yesterday. "Last year I replaced all the windows in my house with that expensive double-pane energy efficient kind, and today, I got a call from the contractor who installed them. He was complaining that the work had been completed a whole year ago and I still hadn't paid for them. Helllooooo? Just because I'm blonde doesn't mean that I am automatically stupid. So, I told him just what his fast talking sales guy had told me last year, that in ONE YEAR these windows would pay for themselves! Helllooooo? It's been a year, I told him. There was only silence at the other end of the line, so I finally just hung up. He never called back. Guess I won that stupid argument. I bet he felt like an idiot."
Why did Obama need to get another dog? Well, the secret inside the Obama household about Bo is finally coming out. Bo is shiftless and lazy and just not any fun anymore. He won't even chase the stick when you throw it. He expects a secret service agent to go get the stick for him. Hence, the need for another dog.